... of everything. Literally. And I find that I am a better person for it. I have had a pretty hectic couple of months, but just when I feel I can't handle it anymore, He is there - so evidently and clear. He always does everything over and above what I need or want.
Our in/fertility battle has really been a hard one. And one day I'll post our long story about it. This month we find out if we are pregnant on the 16th of July - the same day we have a scheduled appointment with the fertility specialist to talk about IVF. I reckon this is going to be one pretty amazing testimony when this is all done.
God is just SO good!
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Monday, April 27, 2009
Faithfulness
Our God is so faithful...
My husband is a traveller, which I don't really mind... I get to do my own thing when he's away BUT he is currently going through about 3-4 weeks of travelling and satan loves to attack when you're down. Things have gone wrong with my car, cell - the dogs are even misbehaving :) but I put my trust in Jesus and I know that He will deliver me from all of this.
Thank you Jesus.
My husband is a traveller, which I don't really mind... I get to do my own thing when he's away BUT he is currently going through about 3-4 weeks of travelling and satan loves to attack when you're down. Things have gone wrong with my car, cell - the dogs are even misbehaving :) but I put my trust in Jesus and I know that He will deliver me from all of this.
Thank you Jesus.
Friday, April 17, 2009
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Being a "good person"
This post may be somewhat contraversial, but know my heart - we're not here to make friends - Jesus was the most contraversial man on earth!
Often my dad says to me, "As long as you're a good person...", but this is not what God says: Isaiah 64:5. Our righteousness is as filthy rags. Obeying the law of Jesus is not righteous. Then the righteousness of God is in his law, but it is not revealed to men by the law. Romans 1:16-17, the righteousness of God is revealed in the gospel to men, and not in the law. It is in the law, but it is not revealed there to us because we are sinners, and sin has so darkened our mind that we can not see it there, and therefore our vision has to beenlightened by some other means, which is the gospel, where we must seek for it, Romans 3:21. The righteousness of God is made known without the law. How? By faith in Jesus Christ, through the gospel, and not by the law.*
The only way we can be seen righteous is through Jesus Christ! In Zech. 3:1-8. Here we have Joshua standing clothed in his own righteousness and Christ takes it off and clothes him with the righteousness of God. Now Joshua had been doing the best he could, but would he have been saved? No. How often we hear people say "I do the best I can," and believe they will be saved. Joshua was reclothed and was to stand with the angels. If then our righteousness is all taken away and Christ clothes us with God's righteousness, then to walk in his law, we will stand with the angels.
God will show us our sins, take it as a blessing because he wants to save us. It is a token of His love for us when sin is made known. Because our Saviour wants to take it away. He wants us to to believe in Him and be saved. Matthew 5:6. Are there not many here who hunger and thirst for righteousness?
*Italics are excerpts from a sermon by A.T. Jones (http://www.shepherds-rod.org/1888/1889sor1.htm)
Often my dad says to me, "As long as you're a good person...", but this is not what God says: Isaiah 64:5. Our righteousness is as filthy rags. Obeying the law of Jesus is not righteous. Then the righteousness of God is in his law, but it is not revealed to men by the law. Romans 1:16-17, the righteousness of God is revealed in the gospel to men, and not in the law. It is in the law, but it is not revealed there to us because we are sinners, and sin has so darkened our mind that we can not see it there, and therefore our vision has to beenlightened by some other means, which is the gospel, where we must seek for it, Romans 3:21. The righteousness of God is made known without the law. How? By faith in Jesus Christ, through the gospel, and not by the law.*
The only way we can be seen righteous is through Jesus Christ! In Zech. 3:1-8. Here we have Joshua standing clothed in his own righteousness and Christ takes it off and clothes him with the righteousness of God. Now Joshua had been doing the best he could, but would he have been saved? No. How often we hear people say "I do the best I can," and believe they will be saved. Joshua was reclothed and was to stand with the angels. If then our righteousness is all taken away and Christ clothes us with God's righteousness, then to walk in his law, we will stand with the angels.
God will show us our sins, take it as a blessing because he wants to save us. It is a token of His love for us when sin is made known. Because our Saviour wants to take it away. He wants us to to believe in Him and be saved. Matthew 5:6. Are there not many here who hunger and thirst for righteousness?
*Italics are excerpts from a sermon by A.T. Jones (http://www.shepherds-rod.org/1888/1889sor1.htm)
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Crosses to bear - the recession
We had our easter service this morning, and our Pastor was talking about the cross - of course LOL. But he said that we all have our own crosses to bear, one of them being the recession. What the recession means:
1. It is there to expose hidden sin (greed, self reliance, waste etc.)
2. Intents to wake up our hearts to the fact that two thirds of the world are ALWAYS in a recession
3. Relocate our roots of joy in grace and not goods
4. Causes the Gospel to be spread when our resources are low... put your faith in God
5. Encourages us to care for people who are needy - you know how you have empathy for someone because you are now experiencing something similar?
Crosses are beautiful doorways to Heaven. Thank you Jesus for our crosses - may ensure that we become more like you (and help me to learn the lesson the firs time round :))
1. It is there to expose hidden sin (greed, self reliance, waste etc.)
2. Intents to wake up our hearts to the fact that two thirds of the world are ALWAYS in a recession
3. Relocate our roots of joy in grace and not goods
4. Causes the Gospel to be spread when our resources are low... put your faith in God
5. Encourages us to care for people who are needy - you know how you have empathy for someone because you are now experiencing something similar?
Crosses are beautiful doorways to Heaven. Thank you Jesus for our crosses - may ensure that we become more like you (and help me to learn the lesson the firs time round :))
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Don't worry about anything, pray about everything
"Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything; tell God your needs and don't forget to thank Him for His answers. If you do this, you will experience God's peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will keep your thoughts and your hearts quiet and at rest as you trust in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 4:6-7)
Monday, March 30, 2009
Wobbly
Well my eggie was not a leftie, it is a rightie - shame poor guy (or is an ovary a girl) - he keeps getting the brunt of my bad moods when he's just trying to make a baby. So I had a bit of a wobbly after the scan, first fertility related wobbly since December... I think good going. It was good that I had a busy day planned.
Anyway beforehand I prayed about it and I kind of felt at the time that I would be "angry" at God if everything was happening on the wrong side - afterwards I just couldn't be cross. The comfort I was getting from Him was just beyond any preconceived idea that I had. I believe God knows the hurt that we are going through - my husband doesn't talk much about it but I know his heart is sore. I just pray that he receives the comfort I do.
Thank you Jesus for your love and comfort.
"I will love You, O Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer; My God, my strength, in whom I will trust; My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold." (Ps 18.1-2)
Anyway beforehand I prayed about it and I kind of felt at the time that I would be "angry" at God if everything was happening on the wrong side - afterwards I just couldn't be cross. The comfort I was getting from Him was just beyond any preconceived idea that I had. I believe God knows the hurt that we are going through - my husband doesn't talk much about it but I know his heart is sore. I just pray that he receives the comfort I do.
Thank you Jesus for your love and comfort.
"I will love You, O Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer; My God, my strength, in whom I will trust; My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold." (Ps 18.1-2)
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Many blessings!
Wow, have I been blessed the last two days!
1. Been following up on clients who owe me money – one client was disputing the amount and delaying the process of payment. I called this morning and he has paid the full amount, no questions asked!
2. Satan works in the same old ways – ever noticed how it is the same things that get you down over and over again? In January I had a car accident, R30 000 worth of damage on my car. This morning, 100m away from the same spot I almost had another car accident. It’s also probably due to my own lack of concentration but I believe it’s Jesus’s blood that kept me safe this time.
3. One particular client has not been in contact with me over the last 5 months or so – just preferring to ignore my calls and emails. Last evening this client contacted me, initiating business again. What a great Lord we serve.
4. God’s presense in my business is just so evident, He was with me in the start, He will be with me through to the end. I truly believe that.
I am learning so much more to just HAND IT OVER to Him. Worry and anxiety are nothing against God’s power and Satan loves to give negative thoughts – of which you will eventually believe because you hear these thoughts so often… and you let yourself think them! Put your stresses into His hands and by His power, the result will be even better than you imagined.
So here’s to a little leftie egg tomorrow morning – visit to the fertility specialist.
1. Been following up on clients who owe me money – one client was disputing the amount and delaying the process of payment. I called this morning and he has paid the full amount, no questions asked!
2. Satan works in the same old ways – ever noticed how it is the same things that get you down over and over again? In January I had a car accident, R30 000 worth of damage on my car. This morning, 100m away from the same spot I almost had another car accident. It’s also probably due to my own lack of concentration but I believe it’s Jesus’s blood that kept me safe this time.
3. One particular client has not been in contact with me over the last 5 months or so – just preferring to ignore my calls and emails. Last evening this client contacted me, initiating business again. What a great Lord we serve.
4. God’s presense in my business is just so evident, He was with me in the start, He will be with me through to the end. I truly believe that.
I am learning so much more to just HAND IT OVER to Him. Worry and anxiety are nothing against God’s power and Satan loves to give negative thoughts – of which you will eventually believe because you hear these thoughts so often… and you let yourself think them! Put your stresses into His hands and by His power, the result will be even better than you imagined.
So here’s to a little leftie egg tomorrow morning – visit to the fertility specialist.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Fertility
God is currently working on my life in many ways, one of them being the difference between freedom in Him and religion. I am the least religious person but I still find myself getting stuck in Christian rituals that feel comfortable. I want my life to be organic, to hear the Spirit leading me.
In Galations it talks about how Abraham and Sarah had fertility problems and they solved the problem themselves (in human terms) by impregnating Sarah's servant. Great they now had a baby! But that baby was conceived by their own strength and so it did not receive God's inheritance for it's life. After many years of prayer, Jesus of course answered and blessed them with their own child - conceived by the power of the Holy Spirit and that child received God's inheritance.
This made me think alot about our fertility journey, about how we have taken much of our earthly and physical issues into our own hands. One feels that one should take a step back and let God be the master. But I feel that this becomes religious - instead of listening to the Holy Spirit and hearing what He has planned for us, we continue deciding whether fertility treatment is right or wrong in God's eyes. I prayed and meditated on this one morning while driving to work, my prayers consumed by something I truly believe (the Bible) and the Holy Spirit whom I truly love. I asked God to show me, or tell me in His own way whether fertility treatment was helping or hindering us in our journey to parenthood. I handed it over to God and forgot about it.
That evening I wanted to get some take-aways and promptly ran right into our Fertility Specialist. A wonderful man but SO far away from his home and work area - and there are a million Steers's in Johannesburg. I was kind of embarressed and didn't think of it again.
Later that evening my husband and I were joking at the coincidence and I just laughed out loud - there are no coincidences - God works in wonderful ways. We are still pursuing fertility treatment, albeit only in very shallow terms and I know that one day we will have a very beautiful testimony to share.
In Galations it talks about how Abraham and Sarah had fertility problems and they solved the problem themselves (in human terms) by impregnating Sarah's servant. Great they now had a baby! But that baby was conceived by their own strength and so it did not receive God's inheritance for it's life. After many years of prayer, Jesus of course answered and blessed them with their own child - conceived by the power of the Holy Spirit and that child received God's inheritance.
This made me think alot about our fertility journey, about how we have taken much of our earthly and physical issues into our own hands. One feels that one should take a step back and let God be the master. But I feel that this becomes religious - instead of listening to the Holy Spirit and hearing what He has planned for us, we continue deciding whether fertility treatment is right or wrong in God's eyes. I prayed and meditated on this one morning while driving to work, my prayers consumed by something I truly believe (the Bible) and the Holy Spirit whom I truly love. I asked God to show me, or tell me in His own way whether fertility treatment was helping or hindering us in our journey to parenthood. I handed it over to God and forgot about it.
That evening I wanted to get some take-aways and promptly ran right into our Fertility Specialist. A wonderful man but SO far away from his home and work area - and there are a million Steers's in Johannesburg. I was kind of embarressed and didn't think of it again.
Later that evening my husband and I were joking at the coincidence and I just laughed out loud - there are no coincidences - God works in wonderful ways. We are still pursuing fertility treatment, albeit only in very shallow terms and I know that one day we will have a very beautiful testimony to share.
My decision to blog
Over the last few weeks God has been encouraging me to share my testimonies. Sharing a testimony frees the blessing so that someone else can receive the blessing. There are many small, but truly miraculous things that happen in my life that can only be attributed to His love and the presence of the Holy Spirit. This journal is for His Glory and Jesus is the only one who does these things in my life. All Glory and Honour to the King of Kings. Amen!
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